Marriage Second Time Around
Saturday, October 28, 2017
I love you. I love you. I love you. Those are the last three statements I made to my current husband on our wedding day. It was how I felt towards him. It summed up all of my feelings for him. Simple yet profound. This was marriage number two for both of us. We had both been married over 10 years to our previous spouses. We both knew "how to commit". Would this be the last one for us? It's a question that still occasionally pops up in my head. Not because I don't love my husband or because I don't think he loves me, more so because it's the "Second One". Not the "First One", or the "Original One" like society tends to label a persons first marriage. Will we get it "right" this time? One thing I know for sure, "when you know better, you do better". I was an impressionable 23 year old when I married back in 1997. I thought I knew it all. I was going to be the best wife out there. Ha! I really didn't even know who "I" was. I learned everything hands-on. I thought I could manage being a wife, working as a then insurance agent, and being a new mom. Many nights I cried because I didn't know but I was never going to give up. We struggled as a young couple. I supported my then husband and vice-a-versa but we didn't have the tools to get through the "bad". We turned to outside forces to help us instead of turning to God. We didn't pray. We didn't go to church or marriage counseling. Could those things have saved our marriage? Who knows but I now know with my second marriage I will turn to God to seek my answers. I am older, wiser and I will do better. My second marriage is just That ,my Second One, but I welcome it eagerly. It's like my 2nd child. I now know what it means to "have and to hold, through sickness and through health,for better or for worse ,til death due us part". I am lucky to have a husband who cherishes me, nurtures our relationship and pushes me to continue to be Elisa and not just Mrs. Ransby. So, Marriage Second Time Around is not giving up, knowing that love and commitment can exist again, and it can be the Happily Ever After that each of you were seeking.
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